It’s been an interesting weekend to say the least. Friday night was spent eating and drinking far too much in Eleven West as part of Dine in Cork week. And after a few hours sleep we hit the road to the new River Lee Hotel on Western Road for our anti natal class.
From 10am until 545pm we sat and listened and yours truly changed his first nappy, in front of a bunch of strangers. Now, I’ve never changed a nappy or diaper (for the Americans reading) in my life. I’ve always found some excuse to get away from it, and in any case I think it’s the parents job to deal with their kids shit and piss. So I all too quickly volunteered to do a nappy change on a doll baby.
I stood there like a fool waiting for instructions, which in fairness the mid wife wanted me to do it myself. Anyway, nappy opened and left opened. Then I was instructed to clean the doll. My brain was clanking away thinking “Sure its a fuckin doll, whats there to clean. You’ll look like a right tool doing some invisible cleaning!”. But then, lo and behold when I pulled the nappy back, it was full of shit! I shit you not! Time slowed down as I tried to process the whole thing. I was then informed that the actual shit was Marmite. Trying to make light of the situation I said “Does anyone want to taste it to check” much to the dismay of everyone there. So if you thought you had a shitty weekend, think again!
Incidentally, I will never eat Marmite again! Sorry Marmite, but its not as if we were best friends anyway!