Thats it now, well until the October bank holiday weekend anyways. Bank Holidays are great, the roads are jammed, the shops are packed and your better off staying inside waiting for it to end. Yesterday was no different. We decided to take a spin to Kinsale just after lunchtime, for the lack of something to do. We reached the turnoff for the old head (yes the one with all the signposts) and to my utter amazement the traffic was backed up this far. I was aware of a short cut into the town, so after a 6.7 turn and 15 minutes of driving through back roads, boreens and farm yards we ended up in the middle of a parade of cars in Kinsale. Well, that was my inital thought, but it was traffic. This time the traffic was backed up all over and in all my wisdom I decided to do another 6.7 turn, only this time it was between 2 parked cars on either side of the road and it turned out to be a 17.3 point turn. The 3 bikers that were behind me werent that impressed with my turning ability and kept scowling. I had a good mind to drive over them, but as the car is relatively new, I didnt want to incur the cost of a repair job. Innishannon went whizzing by, as did Ballinadee. After 3 hours and the most long winded journey we ended up in Clonakilty and drove around the town and headed for home. Wonderful. It was only late last night that I discovered that there was a regatta in Kinsale. It might be an idea in future, for any towns that are having a regatte, to have a big billboard, or even a sign on the outskirts of the town. Nohing to complicated, just something that reads "If you want to come into the town, please abandon your car in an orderly fashion and walk"
Saturday morning I decided to have a deli cooked breakfast, but by the time I got out of bed, it was a lunch I ended up having. Now Im a liberal guy at the best of times, but the sight of a scantily clad couple "being in love" at the deli counter was almost enough for me to offer the back seat of the car. She was dressed in a short shorts, which was about a full dinner away from the toe of the camel, and a skimpy top. Nothing wrong there I hear you say. He was dressed in the ankle shorts and those marvellous sleeveless t-shirts that read Diadora or something. His Celtic tatoo was in full display as was his was "designer stubble" that he must have been growing since 1995. The hugging, the arse grabbing and the full on squeezing started as they approached the counter. He decided to order the aphrodisiac roll, which consisted of eggs, mayo, egg mayonaise and onions. Lovely, that'll set the mood all right. She just ordered an onion or something, obviously afraid that her man might trade her up if she got anything resembling a normal lunch. Well with the stubble thats being growing for 11 years, I couldnt blame her. Not long after this deli love fest they left to go home, or go behind a bush. He probably gorged himself on his egg and onion mush roll, while she watched with hungry eyes, after eating her onion. I would think not long after that, they had sex, which would have been quite memorable. What with her stomach roaring from hunger and his egg and onion combo breath! Theres a time and place for all the above carry on, but for christs sake if your going to try and get it on in a deli, at least take off your clothes......and keep off the bread rolls!