Monday, January 26, 2009

The one with dogs on a leash and super rat

The other day I came across a couple who were out walking their dogs. Nothing bizarre about that I hear you yell. And I'd normally agree except both dogs were on long leads in the middle of the road, while their brain dead owners were trying not to get their fuckin boating shoes muddy.

Seconds later I was driving at a crawl and the gobshites made zero attempt to pull the dogs in off the MIDDLE of the road. So a long punch of the horn finally made them drag their dogs in off the MIDDLE of the road. Then the look. Oh yes, I got the look. You know the look! You'd swear I was after running the dogs over, picking up their dead, yet still warm bodies, skinning them and driving off to sell them to a Korean restaurant.

So after all that, I drove over a rat. Not just any rat. Nope. It felt like I was driving over a speed bump. I knew I hit the little fucker, but there was no sign of a bloody mess in the rear view mirror. So super rat is out there somewhere. Around Monkstown to be precise.

That in turn, takes me back to the time when I managed to kill and dismember 2 rabbits on a dual carriageway. I remember the impact. I was doing around 60mph (that's in olden times) and remember the thump. The car I was driving at the time had a hard plastic / fibreglass bumper that was cracked in 2 places. So the rabbits must have thought something out of Mad Max was hurtling toward them. Anyway, the rabbits went in the front and out the back. I stopped and drove back to see the damage (as you do). I was greeted by 2 rabbit paws (still twitching) and 2 rabbits in halves. As I said Mad Max. Maybe they should have got some costumes from Super rat. And I genuinely felt bad. Then I drove home.

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