The one with bonkes baby names, yes its the celeb ones

What follows is a selection of names, that celebs gave to their kids....

Aanisah: Macy Gray (also mother to Tahmel)

Apple: Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow

Astrella Celeste: Donovan and Linda Lawrence (also parents to Oriole Nebula)

Atherton Grace: Don Johnson and Kelley Phleger

Audio Science: Shannyn Sossamon

Aurelius Cy: Elle Macpherson and Arpad Busson

Blue Angel: U2's The Edge and Aislinn O'Sullivan

Bluebell Madonna: Geri Halliwell

Brooklyn: David and Victoria Beckham (also parents to Romeo and Cruz)

Calico: Alice and Sheryl Cooper (also parents to Sonora Rose)

Camera: Arthur Ashe and Jeanne Moutoussamy

Destry: Steven Spielberg and Kate Capshaw

Diezel Ky: Toni Braxton and Keri Lewis (also parents to Denim Cole)

Fifi Trixibell: Bob Geldof and Paula Yates (also parents to Peaches and Pixie)

Fuchsia: Sting and Frances Tomelty

Gaia: Emma Thompson and Greg Wise

Gulliver: Gary Oldman and Donya Fiorentino

Heaven: Lil' Mo (also mother to God'Iss Love Stone)

Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily: Paula Yates and Michael Hutchence

Hopper: Sean Penn and Robin Wright

Ireland: Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger

Jaz: Steffi Graf and Andre Agassi

Jazz Domino: Joe Strummer

Jermajesty: Jermaine Jackson and Alejandra Genevieve Oaziaza (previously married to Jermaine's brother Randy)

Kal-El Coppola: Nicholas Cage (Kal-El is Superman’s original birth name)

Kyd: David Duchovny and Tea Leoni

Lark Song: Mia Farrow and André Previn

Lennon: Liam Gallagher and Patsy Kensit

Liberty: Ryan Giggs

London Emilio: Slash

Luna Coco Patricia: Frank Lampard and Elen Rive

Marquise: 50 Cent

Memphis Eve: Bono

Moon Unit: Frank Zappa, also father to Dweezil and Diva Muffin

Moxie CrimeFighter: Penn Jillette (also father to Zolten)

Ocean: Forest Whitaker (also father to Sonnet and True)

Pilot Inspektor: Jason Lee and Beth Riesgraf

Poppy Honey: Jamie and Jules Oliver (also parents to Daisy Boo)

Rocket: Robert Rodriguez (also father to Racer, Rebel and Rogue)

Rufus Tiger: Roger Taylor also father to Tiger Lily and Lola Daisy

Saffron Sahara: Simon and Yasmin Le Bon (also parents to Amber Rose and Tallulah Pine)

Sage Moonblood: Sylvester Stallone and Sasha Czack (also parents to Seargeoh)

Satchel: Spike Lee and Tonya Lewis Lee

Seven Sirius: Andre Benjamin and Erykah Badu

Shiloh Nouvel: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie

Sosie: Kevin Bacon and Kyra Sedgwick

Suri: Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes

Tallulah: Bruce Willis and Demi Moore (also parents to Scout and Rumer)

Willow Camille Reign: Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith

Zola Ivy: Eddie Murphy and Nicole Mitchell

While some of the above names may seem ok, by normal human standards there are a few that really make you ask "Was it drugs? Was it drink? or just plain Im a celeb and I'll name my kids whatever the fuck I want" I was planning on going into major analysis on the names, but whats the point.

Nicole Kidman called her sprog Sunday Rose. Mr.Chest McConaghey called his kid Levis or something. While there are enough Johns and Marys around the world to last us a lifetime, we dont really need any more Moxie Crimefighters or Lark Song. If there are any more, then people need a serious flake of a fist. I'd imagine some of the names take inspiration from things that mean something to people. But surely, a Lark singing its tits off is as good as it got for Mia Farrow. Come on!!!

People asked me last night, what I'd call my kids? For a boy, I've always said it'd be Lucas. Im sure you can figure out the inspiration.

The one with bums being pinched

By all accounts, arse grabbing, buttock bashing or whatever you want to call it is alive and very popular in Cork. It seems to be the staple diet of a tribe of lads on a night out. "Yeah, gwan whooser, yer wan over there. Leave a mark whoosey, gwan biy." While on the other side of the gender coin, the ladies seem to be doing plenty of ball bruising and testicular tickles themselves.


My baby producing factory (note factory, not little workshop) has been grabbed on a night out by a random stranger on at least one occasion, and if memory serves me correctly, they werent giving out free medical checkups at the time.


Quite a number of listeners seem to think its a sign that someone is interested. Maybe it is a bit of harmless fun. Given the amount of single blokes out there, Id imagine theres not too many would complain when a random female stranger cops a feel of their lower fruit bags. Theres an oul cliche out there, that we are a backwards nation. Maybe this arse pinching is a bit backwards. In the times of fellas being chased around by Saber Tooth Tigers, they'd give some oul doll they fancied a belt of a stick over the head. Apparently, this implied that it was time to increase the population. So maybe this arse pinching is men going back to their tribal roots. Granted, sticks seem to have been replaced by glass bottles.

The one with Pink

Pink wrapped up Live at the Marquee last night with a pretty shit hot gig by all accounts. While I wouldnt be a huge fan, Ive seen her live in the past and she puts on a great show. Either way, I was on air, as usual. Conducting. Yup, the Cork Talks Back car horn symphony orchestra had its last concert of the year last night, and what a finale it was.

Baring the following pics, taken by my fiancee, that is all.

The one with a link

http://lro.jhuapl.edu/NameToMoon/index.php

Pretty cool!!!!!

The one with the mystery sound scene from last night

So there ya go. Last nights mystery sound scene, that was 100% correctly identified by only one!

Also, this is post 800.

The one on a Sunday

Rock n Roll......................

The one with looks and personality

This date last year, we were at a Yankees game in Yankee stadium. Below is a shot I took at the game. This time next year, I'll be a few weeks away from being dragg....walked up the aisle. Currently, I'm sitting in the kitchen. Happy 4th of July to all the Americans. Anyway, enough of the whatever the above is.

Looks or Personality.....Well, let Google Image search help decide this little ol deeeebate.

I know who I'd be sending a birthday card too. But I wouldnt be sending one with a long, heartfelt message in it. Maybe a voucher for plastic surgery. Or a map to a desert island. I'd just send the other my number.

To be realistic about the whole thing, the majority of people first see the physical side of someone and then get to know the actual insides of the person. In more ways than one. Extremely good looking people hang out in packs and never venture too far away from one another. The average looking Joe soap also hangs out, but its in a herd as opposed to a pack. A mixture of the 2 species seems to be extremely rare, although stunning good looking women have been spotted around Cork, hanging onto ugly, rough looking men. I'm not sure whether its the attraction of "He's a dealer girl" or the "He'll knock you around the place luv" or what. But a mix of the 2 species has been found in Cork.

Personally, I find a certain amount of the beautiful people with their heads so far up their asses, its like the prison scene in Hancock. There as shallow as the Serengeti during the dry season. And when it comes to some luvin, forget about it. Ive found in the past and from various conversations over the years that the better looking the person, the worse they are in the sack. Its like your privileged to climb on top of them. "Hey, your fucking a good looking person. You want this. You do the work. Now hand me a mirror so I can look at myself"

In an ideal world, you should have both. Looks and Personality. But it never seems to work out like that. Someone, in my book, has to be able to hold an intelligent conversation. It doesn't have to about Nuclear Physics or the plight of the spear fishing monkeys in Borneo. But it has to be more than the "Ohhh my gooodddddd" "Hahahahahaha" shit that people can regurgitate. While, as Dave Mac said in the recorded piece last night, you'll give some good looking individual, who is a fool, a few goes. Theres not many people out there who would refuse a go on a stunning person. But when they barley flinch during the act(s) and can barley have a conversation, people go off and find someone, who can actually walk the walk and talk the talk!

All that said, the doorbell rang a minute ago. Someone flogging paintings. Someone from New York, flogging paintings. Normally, being the nice person I am, they get the door slammed in their face at hello. Kinda, the opposite of the "You had me at hello" in Jerry Maguire. But I listened to the spiel and even smiled a few times. Why? Because the person standing in the pissing rain, holding some dodgy art was absolutely stunning. Shit personality, probably.

I'm in Club Light (Mallow) Saturday night, which is now open until 2.30. So an extra half hour to shake your ass to some serious choonage!!!

The one with a whole load of Dark Knight clips

Im still undecided whether the huge amount of clips that are coming online for the Dark Knight are a good idea. Either way, Im after taking off my pants for these! If I were wearing knickers, they'd be pulled to one side!

The one with cinema etiquette

I went to see Hancock yesterday. I left Hancock feeling a bit disappointed. I also left Hancock barely with my life intact. Well.....

Does anybody know how to remotely conduct themselves in a, what some would call, intimate public place. The majority of younger audience members either stunk of farts or piss with a high selection of the adult audience trying to conduct huge conversations on the phone. The ones who weren't busy telling someone in their phonebook, that they were in the cinema, were busy sneezing with all their might. At one point I thought something had happened in the cinema as there seemed to be a large mist forming. But it only turned out to be a spray of snot and mucus.


"Yeah, I'm in the cinema" " No, the cinema" "The new Will Smith flick" "I think its called Hancock" "Yeah" "Hmmmm" "Yeah" "Yeah, that's the one, where he tosses the whale" "Yeah". Shut the fuck up! Turn off your phone. You don't need to have a conversation on the phone during the movie. If its really important, they'll call back. Its 90 minutes of your life. None of us are that important. And speaking of important, if they cant get hold of you, they'll fuckin text you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe some of these savages are proud of the fact that they can sneeze and have to show the rest of us how its done. God help the poor girl that ends up snogging one of these piss reeking young fellas. Now I'm not getting on my high horse or anything, I sneeze and fart like the rest of you. But at least I'll try and keep my nostril projectiles until theres not a full audience of people around. And if I do sneeze around a group of lookers on, I'll put my hand over my fuckin mouth. Its not that hard! I'm sure these neanderthals use their hands for other things, such as pulling bananas down off trees and killing fish with spears.

I know its not everybody, but a good few people, would really want to wake up and take a shower. And put your hand over your mouth when you sneeze. You know, your hand. You spend enough time grooming your mates looking for bugs!

The one with the Skype laughter chain

As promised!!!!! Check the hyena dude!