The one with Lilly Allen and Elton John

If there were ever a need to put a pair of steel toe capped boots up someones hole, its this...

Only came across it this morning!!!!!

The one with the Collider yoke

Large Hadron Collider or LHC as its known to the boffins! Maybe they've given it a nickname, like Horris or something! Is it gonna bring the end of the world? Is it gonna create a black hole? Or will it bring some bad ass dudes from the 9th dimension who will kick some serious ass? I don't think anybody knows. Apparently its safe! I'm sure that's been said about other things before! As a listener pointed out last night, the laws of normality wont allow for something as exciting as a black hole!

Im intrigued with the idea of the end of the world. For years, we've got the Hollywood version. That normally involves Bruce Willis or Will Smith saving the day with 0.000000001 seconds left on the end of the world bomb or whatever is threatening our existence. What would the LHC version be? Would shit just stop and that would be it. One minute your eating your ham sandwich and then nothing! Just darkness! Just blackness! Nothing. No speaking, talking or eating ham sandwiches! That's that! Earths gone. Disappeared. No suffering, no pain! Just gone! Like a lightbulb that just blew! And theres no one around to replace that light bulb!!!

On the other hand, and the more likely scenario is that nothing bad will happen. Theres always nay Sayers who jump on the band wagon and have got their lawsuits to stop whats going on!

Now, if shit doesn't get fecked up, then maybe we'll get flying cars from whatever they discover! And I'm talking real flying cars, not the crap that's around at the moment! I'm talking about the stuff they had in Hill Valley in Back to the Future II! Real kick ass flying cars! 

Maybe they'll discover other dimensions! Maybe some stuff will slip through? Maybe we need Hellboy to sort shit out! 

Oh yeah, almost forgot the hadron collider rap I played last night! It explains everything bar the Hellboy scenario! Or the end of the world part :)

Anyway, on a final note if the fan does start to get covered in shit, this is what I'll be listening to on Wednesday!

The one with nakedness!

Naked Listener night happens tonight!

The one with Paddys Revenge

Right, on a slightly different note a few people have been asking non stop about a particular track that I play in Club Light. Been spinning it on and off for the last month or so and tis a stormer!

Anyway, for today, well for the current moment in time, that is all!

The one with Jam Junior

Junior Cert next week! So for those of you figuring out what to do, do it in style!!!

The one with the Zack and Miri make a porno trailer!

NSFW - The trailer finally arrives! This absolutely, positively has made me take my pants off!!!! Funny with a capital fuckin F!

http://www.askmen.com/video/2008_apr/apr02.html

The one thats a small take on Google Chrome

So about 40 mins ago, Google launched Google Chrome

It downloaded and installed in seconds, and man is it fast. During random browsing it rips through pages, but at times it ground to a halt if a video made an appearance. I know its a BETA, so alls excusable, but Im lovin it so far!

The one with google, lions and salt

Fairly shortly, Google are about to jump into Internet history again, by releasing a beta web browser. Its called chrome. Its about to launch any minute now. No doubt there is a queue of geeks forming around their PCs and Macs as I type this. At some point this afternoon I'll go off and grab it, at my ease (says he who's checking the Google blog every 2 minutes) and have a nose. Maybe porn will look better on it, who knows.

The following may seem very, down the local shop conversation, but the weather is an absolute fuck up. I've got feck all opportunity to cut the grass and its so tall at this stage its probably easier to sell the house and move somewhere else, than cut the bloody thing. I'm sure I saw a lion wandering around in it yesterday. Maybe it was the lion that escaped from Belfast Zoo. But it wasn't a lion, it was a dog. That's some big feckin dog! How does one get a dog confused with a lion. Maybe it chewed on someones shoes as opposed to ripping out their stomach through their arse.

On another note, last night I made the startling announcement that there is no salt in RedFM. And duly started up the Salt Aid campaign. How this works is fairly simple. If you send me sachets of salt and include your name and address, I will send you a fantastic RedFM car sticker which is far better than putting a Nike stripe on your love wagon. So, salt sachets to

Victor Barry
RedFM
1 UTC
Bishopstown
Co.Cork

And rest assured that you are helping a great cause. Think of the many members of RedFM staff that you will help! Don't leave us have chips without salt any more! Send your salt sachets!

The one with the results of where are you listening

THE CORK TALKS BACK WITH VICTOR BARRY WHERE ARE YOU LISTENING POLL

45% HOME

55% WORK

-------

25% CAR

19% TAKING A DUMP

18% GARDEN

10% SHEDS

7% TRACTOR / TRAILER

4% BATHS

4% GARDA STATION

4% COW SHED MILKING COWS

3% TREES

2% LABOUR WARD HAVING A BABY

1% BOOT OF CAR

1% HORSEBOX

1 % PLATFORM ALPHA OFF THE OLD HEAD OF KINSALE

1% BROKEN DOWN CAR

The one with Star Wars V Rush Hour

Yup, tis a lazy blog post, albeit a funny one!